I don't know me.
I thought that once I got old enough
My reflection, I could see
More clearly
But it just keeps getting more foggy everyday
Always, there are more dragons to slay
More convoluted questions
And even more answers that leave me lost
Why is life like a continuous game where I never seem to overcome the biggest boss?
Whatever that is for me
I want to finally be able to see
And to realize why am I here?
Who am I to be?
Talk to me in the way you used to
With your eyes
Wondering around my silhouette frame
Hunting every curve
Salivating
You craving my hands to motion towards you
So that you could feast on my insatiable body.
Raw and bent over
You feel how wet I am
With every thrust
Pushing us towards the edge of bliss
You biting my lips
Me tasting your kiss
Leaning up against anything that will hold our weight
And our passion
Everything is bouncing
Including our hearts as we're joined together in a rhythm
That only we can dance to.
When it comes to hardships and heartache
God watches but He does not move.
He allows his children to depend less on him
And more on the power that He already instilled into them.
Like a loving parent, His heart breaks when we fall
But like a strong parent, He waits until we get up.
He does not enable
He does not give excuses as of why we're incapable
He knows we're mighty enough
To slay our own demons
And sometimes we will have to cry ourselves to sleep
In order to realize that no one is coming to save us
Which is why God waits for us to realize
That He already gave us the tools to save ourselves.
God watches but He does not move
How else is a Master teacher going to push His students to be excellent?
To be the creators of their own reality
And to be the makers of their very own heaven or hell?
It is our choice.
After all,
Free will.
I am not afraid of aging
Aging is a badge of honor
It is the Universe telling me
That there are still more lessons
For me to learn
That I am still a student
Waiting to pass my final exam.
Beauty is my journey
It is not what someone sees on
My physical body.
Though it may be subjective to another's perception
I am a soul.
The soul doesn't age.
It advances.
And I am never afraid of getting better.
And becoming the master of my own life.
Black girl, smile.
Let all the weight from your shoulders
Fall like autumn leaves
Rest
Be juvial
Release your sadness
And scuplt it into joy
Paint happiness on you like fresh new skin.
Wear it confidently
Let your smile be the light at the end of your tunnel
Breathe
Allow the air in your lungs to sweep away the old fingerprints of pain
Be alive and dance
Show off your exuberant colors
Let those deep, melanated dimples show
And your lips, nose, eyes, and teeth be mosaic art.
Your smile is your crown
Let it shine in the sun
May it never be submerged by society's noose
Or by wicked hands that prey on you
Bloom and rise like the carefree strands of curls on your head
Walk into life's oasis
As one of its finest and most rare creations.
I love you, fear.
You've kept me safe in a world where chaos rules.
But I need to break up with you.
Because "safety" has suddenly become "too comfortable".
A seed can not stay underground
It must gather the courage to grow anchoring roots and sturdy branches.
But understand this-
You know I love you, fear.
But I love me more.
And too much of you will poison my adventurous spirit
I have to let go.
I have to fly.
